What matters more than the mistake itself is how we respond when it happens. If you make the mistake, do you try to hide or cover it up? Or do you own up to it and tell someone what happened without them having to find out about it first? If you find out that someone else has made a mistake, how do you bring it up to them? The Moment of Truth (or MOT) tool can help you approach these conversations about mistakes and respond to them with grace and truth.
The Moment of Truth happens in four steps: reality, story, plan, and feedback
1. Acknowledge Reality
We often make the mistake in difficult conversations of jumping to step two, the story. But before we can tell why something happened, we first have to get straight what it was that occurred. For example, a student trying to appeal the late penalty on their essay might want to start by explaining that their internet went out that night. But they need to first establish what happened that this MOT is about: the essay was turned in late.
2. Get the Story
After both parties have a common understanding of the facts, we can move on to trying to figure out why expectations weren’t met. This is where it might be appropriate to explain that your wifi glitched at the last minute, or that you were taking a roommate to the hospital, or whatever happened that caused you to get the essay in late.
This might include a clarification of the expectations. Did you know that the essay was due at 5:00? Oh, I thought it was due at midnight. The person who has missed expectations might also have to be honest and admit that the mistake was due to mismanagement of their time or disordered priorities. Having these conversations within a Create-Something Culture rather than a Don’t-Make-A-Mistake Culture can help both parties feel comfortable enough to share, knowing the goal is to move forward rather than finding a scapegoat.
3. Make a Plan
Next, a plan should be made to help expectations be met in the future. In this case, maybe the teacher realized that a reminder of the deadline time as well as the day is necessary to help students understand the expectations. Or the student might decide they need to have assignments ready an hour before the deadline so they have time to go to the library if their wifi glitches again.
Making a mistake is not an issue. Mistakes happen. What is an issue is if a mistake becomes a habit and there is no effort to correct it or improve for next time. The goal of this step is to work towards continuous improvement.
4. Give Feedback
Finally, set a time where you will loop back around to see how the plan is going. If the plan put in place is not driving the desired behavior change, another MOT may be necessary. Creating a feedback loop can help you act, learn, and adjust along the Path more quickly and efficiently.
A Moment of Truth is not just something that a boss has with an employee. You can also use this tool when talking yourself through a mistake or to confess to making a mistake yourself. It can be used in a business context as well as within a family, between friends, or on any team.
The combination of intentionally cultivating a Create-Something Culture in where you recognize that a mistake usually happens because of structure, then leadership, and then you, can create an environment where healthy and productive MOT’s can happen and we can learn from our mistakes.
Gracie McBride is the Content and Systems Development Coordinator at The Crossroad.
