In every endeavor, you will reach a point we call the Pit of Despair, where you will have to decide whether it’s worth continuing with the project or starting over. In the last article, we explored the reasons why it’s good to persevere through and do hard things. But I recognize that there are situations where it might be best to abandon ship. So today, we’ll explore why that might be the case.
Follow Your There
The first reason you might want to start over is if a project no longer helps you follow your There. Your Transcendent There is your guiding light that helps you make decisions along the way. And then there are Strategic Theres that give you tangible long-term goals to strive towards.
Some projects might not directly serve a current Strategic There, but you can see how they will help get you further in the direction you’re going. But if an endeavor is taking you in a direction you don’t want to go in, it might be worth starting over with something that is more aligned with your There.
You Lack Desire, Skill, and Support
The Four Squares is a tool we use when diagnosing your Here as a part of a Moment of Truth, and it can be helpful in the Pit as well. If something is hard, let’s consider why. Is it because you lack the desire to complete it, the skills needed to see it through, or the support necessary to acquire them? These issues are solvable on their own, but more difficult to overcome when combined. This is what is known as the Can’t and Won’t Square. In the Can and Won’t Square, you can use your There to help you see where this task is taking you. In the Can’t and Will Square, you can ask for help and acquire the skills needed to complete the task. But if you are in the Can’t and Won’t Square, you should consider if this is helping you achieve your There, as well as what you’re pretending not to know that could be hindering your ability to move forward.
Redefining Failure
Starting over is not failure. If quitting now helps you reach your There later, then it’s actually a success! It is good to push through and develop the muscle of perseverance. But we should not persevere for perseverance’s sake. Persevere when it helps you achieve your There, and start again when it doesn’t. Have the humility to recognize when you’ve made a mistake, and then ALA (act, learn, and adjust) for next time as you continue on the Path.
Gracie McBride is the Content and Systems Development Coordinator at The Crossroad.
