When you think of leaders that you admire, what comes to mind? You might think about what they did; their accomplishments. But I’d bet that you also list character traits about them, like humble, hard-working, or a good listener. When we think about what kind of leaders we want to be, we might jump ahead to what we want to accomplish in our organization. But in order to do those kinds of things, you first have to become the kind of leader you would want to follow from the inside out.
Referent Power
Referent Power is the most influential type of power. It is not gained through position, knowledge or expertise, or as a result of coercion or rewards. Referent Power is gained by stewarding your character. It is about becoming the kind of leader who people trust. Remember, you can’t control whether people trust you, only if you trust them. Therefore, if you try to build your Referent Power pillars so that people will follow you, that’s not going to build trust. Approach the process from an honest place of wanting to build your character. Superficially strong pillars will never last.
With that in mind, there are six pillars of Referent Power that you can strengthen to become the best version of yourself.
Physical
While this is often overlooked when thinking about character traits, your physical appearance affects someone’s first impression of you. This doesn’t just have to do with appearance either, but with presence. Even just a simple thing like standing up straight can have a huge impact on your first impression. You don’t need to change yourself. Rather, present yourself in the best light and with confidence.
Financial
Similarly to the physical pillar, this isn’t about having the most money, but about how you steward it. No matter how rich you are, are you generous, or stingy? Do you make wise and measured choices, or do you spend above your means? How you manage your finances can reveal where your priorities lie.
Social
This pillar has to do with how you interact with others relationally. Strengthen your social pillar by practicing good listening skills and treating everyone with kindness and respect. You do not have to be an extrovert to have a strong social pillar. Being a present and honest friend will go a long way.
Spiritual
Whether or not you consider yourself religious, everyone has a spiritual life. It guides your perspective and values. An often neglected part of the spiritual pillar is the importance of community, and not cultivating it in isolation. While this might not be the most observable pillar from the outside, it will have the biggest impact as it transforms your life from the inside out.
Mental/ Emotional
How well do you know your own emotions? Do they catch you by surprise, or do you suppress them? Do you have frequent outbursts with the ones you love? Cultivating your emotional pillar does not mean that you will never be sad or angry. In fact, depending on the situation, it might mean that you show those emotions more.
For the mental side, strengthen this by seeking to learn new things and pursuing the truth. But don’t let your knowledge turn into pride. These two sides go hand in hand, as you want to balance intellect with emotional intelligence.
Family/ Team
Finally, how you work on a team or relate to those closest to you is a vital part of your character. Do you view everyone on the team as equal contributors, or is it a competition to get to the top? This pillar is the test of the strength of your mental/emotional pillar. Can you maintain healthy emotional boundaries and listen with humility?
Remember, the ultimate purpose of cultivating these pillars is not to become the best leader, but to become the best version of yourself. Seek to cultivate your character to become a person people can trust, but don’t try to control whether or not they do.
Gracie McBride is the Content and Systems Development Coordinator at The Crossroad.
