In the last article, we delved into the formula for listening: Humility + Focus + Curiosity. Listening is often an underrated part of communication, as we focus more on speaking well, especially as leaders. But communication involves two parties: the sender and the receiver. Today we will build on the formula for listening by exploring two tools to help you grow in your listening skills: active and observational listening. Even if you are familiar with these tools from other contexts, thinking about them in the Servant Leader framework alongside the Formula for Listening will bring new insights and deepen your understanding.
Active Listening
The opposite of Active Listening would be Passive Listening, where the receiver makes no effort to let the sender know that they are understanding the message. But with Active Listening, the receiver continually lets the sender know they are paying attention and trying to understand by repeating the message back to make sure they are on the same page. If they are not, this gives the sender the chance to clarify or to explain their message another way.
This helps you activate the Humility part of the Formula for Listening by acknowledging that you may not have the correct understanding of the sender’s message. Active listening gets rid of the presumption that you have it correct.
Active listening also helps you Focus on the message, getting Curious about the meaning as you listen.
Observational Listening
Observational listening is mainly a tool to help with the Focus and Curiosity components of the Formula for Listening. It involves the receiver making a mental movie picturing the sender’s message as they give it. If your mind tends to wander while listening to others, this tool can help give you something to focus on. You can then ask clarifying questions as the sender speaks in order to see the image in your head clearer. This can also be used to see things from the sender’s perspective, putting yourself in their shoes in your mind. Being curious about their point of view also recognizes that you have the humility to admit there is something you can learn from the sender.
Use these tools independently or together to help you practice the formula for listening; to act with humility, focus, and curiosity as a receiver. Remember that relationships are just as important as productivity. When you communicate with others, seek to understand each other for the sake of the task at hand. But also treat the other person with respect to cultivate the relationship and continue to have clear communication in the future.
Gracie McBride is the Content and Systems Development Coordinator at The Crossroad.
